THE MISUSE OF PERSONS Analyzing Pathological Dependency
Coen, Stanley J. (2013-11-26). The Misuse of Persons: Analysing Pathological Dependency (Kindle Location 9). Taylor and Francis. Kindle Edition.
quote in chapter on Responsibility for Conflict
“For the patient to become separate and responsible for himself, like an ordinary analysand, the patient must relinquish a pathological, defensive identification with a destructively undermining parent. The terrors of confronting the destructive collusion with such a parent will be considerable.”
same chapter quote
“The problem is not just that such patients are terrified of their intense feelings and wishes; we all are at times. More damaging is the collusive belief (with the parent) that separateness is death, that neither can survive facing what exists inside himself. If this destructive illusion/delusion can be confronted, then the patient may become able to accept responsibility for his own conflicts.”
“He needs to consolidate an identification with healthier aspects of the parents and with the analyst’s work ego, which emphasizes that facing and tolerating what is most painful within are necessary to become fully separate.”
Coen, Stanley J. (2013-11-26). The Misuse of Persons: Analysing Pathological Dependency (Kindle Locations 206-207). Taylor and Francis. Kindle Edition.